Peace, Love, and Protein Shakes: Vanessa's Bariatric Blog

Last time I wrote, about over two months ago, I mentioned that I had a stricture. I felt absolutely stuck. I still do. At this point, however, I have some more information, and a path to progress, somewhat. First, I was going through a lot of changes and loss recently. I've been dealing with the mutual ending of my relationship, as well as a temporary layoff and switch in companies at work. I was very anxious and depressed, which made waiting for my appointment with the specialist in May unbearable. That, along with prolonged nausea and vomiting, added to my stress. Yet I held on. Second, I had two endoscopes done with both a gastroenterologist and a surgeon to assess the issues with my stomach. The blockage was confirmed by the gastro and redefined by the surgeon as a "gastro-gastric fistula". It's a connection between my new stomach pouch and my old one that is small, but noticeable enough to be a major problem to say the least. It's like my old stomach is a...

I have been working out regularly—never thought I’d say that last year! —since June 15 th , 2017. That’s a little over 2 weeks. It has been challenging, but worth it. I love being consistent in the healthy habit of exercise. Yeah, I said that I love exercise. Weird. So, in a way, I’m glad that the blood clot was a wake-up call to get active. What I’m not happy about, however, is that despite my best efforts, I am at a plateau. I haven’t lost any more weight. I know that a year or so after weight loss surgery, the rapid weight loss, or “honeymoon” period ends and weight loss is harder to maintain, but dang, it’s soul crushing. Also, I just read an article from The Cleveland Clinic that says that weight gain after exercise is common due to water shifting in the body and muscle gain, plus the recovery process. Well, duh. I’m sure I’ve read this in some fitness magazine in the past, but I forgot. It doesn’t make things any easier to deal with, but at least I have an explanation. ...

Hey everyone! Yes, it's been ONE YEAR since my gastric bypass weight loss surgery! I can't believe this time has come. It's been a rough ride, but I am continuing this journey, no matter what. I've worked too hard and come too far to turn back now. My brain is just going to have to catch up with my new body. That's what I've been realizing lately. Yes, there are days when I literally have a funeral for the foods that I can't (and don't NEED or WANT to) eat anymore, but then days like this remind me that it's not worth the agony and weight gain. Today, I managed to walk down my block and visit several places: the convenience store, the post office, the neighborhood Goodwill, and the library, and it felt so good. There was even a nice breeze and sunshine going too. I would have never had the stamina to do this a year ago. Time really does make a difference. Anything could happen in a year, a month, a day, an hour, or even a minute or second. So d...

Two blog posts in one week, and consecutively? Nice! I had another letter to write in my open letter challenge tonight that I thought would be appropriate for this blog, as it has to do with the one thing I have despised the most in my life--my own body. Here it is. Warning: it's really personal. Yet I am willing to be vulnerable in sharing this anyway, as it is part of my weight loss journey. Dear Body, I have to be honest and admit that I have never liked you, ever. I have loathed your existence ever since I was made aware of the fact that I was overweight as a child, and eventually, obese until 2016, when I had gastric bypass surgery. I have always de-emphasized and minimized you because you were a constant source of public spectacle, ridicule, and embarrassment. I instead chose to be cerebral and neurotic, existing mainly from the neck up, especially my mind. In fact, even though I have lost weight. I still despise you greatly. You are still completely uncooperative a...

I wrote this letter as part of an open letter challenge that I started at the beginning of this year, and then resumed this month. Today, the option was to write a letter of my choice, and fittingly, I decided to write a letter to my gastric bypass surgery. Doing this exercise was very helpful, and I hope it gives you insight on my progress. Thank you for reading. Dear Gastric Bypass, You have provided me with many positives and new opportunities. Even though I nearly died after surgery last year, I am still grateful for what you have done and allowed me to accomplish in a short amount of time. In less than a year, I have lost 150 pounds and am currently maintaining it. I went from being 360 pounds and a size 26/28, even a size 30 in some stores, and now I am an 18/20, which allows me to shop at more regular and socially acceptable stores. I have a greater desire to step out of my comfort zone and try new things, as well as attempt to socialize, if only for a short time. I feel li...